WHAT IS

HONOR-BASED VIOLENCE?

“My father caught me with my secret boyfriend. He took away my phone and threatened to hit me. He yelled: “You know what happens to girls like you!”. I’m genuinely afraid that something very serious will happen...”
— Girl, 21
 
 

Do you experience strict control, pressure, or threats? Are you subjected to violence from your family or others due to honor? Has your family excluded you because of choices you have made?

Honor-based violence is violence within close relationships. When we use the word "violence" here, we mean all forms of violence. It can be physical and psychological violence, as well as economic, digital, and sexual violence.

Honor-based violence is characterized by the family or group prioritizing their needs over the individual's needs, rights, and safety. The violence is triggered by the family's need to protect or restore lost honor. Anyone can be subjected to honor-based violence, but women and individuals with different sexual orientations or gender identities are often more vulnerable. Family honor is often tied to the sexual and moral behavior of girls and women. Boys and men can also be both victims of violence and perpetrators themselves. For example, they may be forced to commit violence against their female family members.

The perpetrators of violence can be more than one person, and they may even be located in other countries.

Honor-based violence can occur across religions, countries of origin, and ethnicities.

 

Honor-based violence usually occurs within families or religious communities with strong collectivist and patriarchal values.

Individuals who are subjected honor-based violence may:

  • Be subjected to shame and guilt

  • Face threats

  • Experience social exclusion

  • Be deprived of their freedom

  • Experience physical and/or psychological violence

  • Be forced into a marriage

Forms of violence

  • Physical violence is often the first thing that comes to mind when discussing violence. Physical violence includes being hit, kicked, pushed, pulled, or forcibly coerced into doing something you don't want to do. Confinement, isolation, hiding crutches, wheelchairs, medication, or other aids you need can also be forms of violence.

  • Psychological violence is when words and aggressive behavior are used to pressure you and limit your life. You may feel scared, powerless, and worthless. Belittling, being indifferent to, and humiliating others are also forms of psychological violence. Examples include: "I will kill you," "You are worthless," "You are so ugly and fat that no one could love you.". Negative social control falls under psychological violence.

  • Economic violence is when others attempt to control your finances. Examples of this can include forcing you to provide passwords to your bank account or persuading you to take out loans.

  • Latent violence refers to feeling unsafe because you fear being subjected to violence, either due to past experiences or received threats. It also involves adapting your behavior and mannerisms to avoid provoking or upsetting someone to the point where they resort to violence. Sometimes, individuals who are victims of violence may even provoke it themselves to avoid waiting for it to happen. Living in this manner is equally harmful as physical and psychological violence.

  • Sexual violence can range from inappropriate touching to rape. It occurs when someone does or says something sexual to or about you without your consent. This includes all forms of harassment and abuse that involve sex or target your sexuality. While sex is a normal and often positive aspect of a relationship, being in a relationship does not grant someone automatic sexual entitlement over you. There may sometimes be uncertainty about when sexual activities cross the line into what we consider sexual violence. The boundary is subjective and revolves around your own experience of feeling exploited and no longer engaging in activities willingly.

  • Digital violence occurs when someone monitors, controls, threatens, and/or harasses you using social media or a phone. An example of this is when someone threatens to share online pictures of you that you do not want to be made public.